Making LGBTQ+ History Every Day

Knowing our history

October marks LGBTQ+ History Month, a time to recognize the impactful and diverse history of the LGBTQ+ community. This year’s observance feels especially poignant, as we’ve witnessed attempts from politicians and school boards across the country to erase our history through curriculum bans, book bans, de-funding diversity initiatives, and more. These efforts are part of a larger effort to diminish and demean our community — because the opposition knows, just as we do, that with access to our history comes connection, resilience, and power.

We’ve always been here, and we’re not going anywhere. By recognizing this ancestry of LGBTQ+ families who fought for our rights to live without fear — both on national stages and behind closed doors — we tap into a strength and sense of belonging that makes us unstoppable. When we can identify ourselves not only in the world around us, but in the worlds that came before us, we feel safer, prouder, and more determined to create a better future for our children, much in the same way our fore-parents did for us.

For this reason, Family Equality marks its 45th anniversary this LGBTQ+ History Month by renewing its commitment to protecting and preserving the history of LGBTQ+ family equality, beginning with the appointment of the organization’s first Associate Director of Archives, Storytelling, and Brand.

Forty-five years of changemakers

As a trained archivist, and a long-time Family Equality team member, I’ve seen firsthand what happens when we can connect with, celebrate, and challenge our past. I also know that our history’s true power comes not only from the great LGBTQ+ heroes that we will celebrate as a community this month, but also from the small actions of everyday people — actions that are too often lost to traditional historical narratives but that, taken together overtime, create this movement.

Like…

A group of previously married gay dads joining forces forty-five years ago this month at the first National March on Washington for Gay and Lesbian Rights. From their desire to connect and find joy, the Gay Fathers Coalition was created, growing from a volunteer-run group of international LGBTQ+ parents to Family Equality, the leading national organization for current and future LGBTQ+ families.

1980s

Scott Davenport and Tim Fisher opening the doors of their Provincetown rental to fifteen other families vacationing there in 1994. That dinner began a tradition that would become the largest annual gathering of LGBTQ+ families in the world. As we celebrated the thirtieth anniversary of Family Week this year, we welcomed more than 1,500 individuals to the Cape for an entire week of community, connection, and fun.

1990s

Outspoken children of LGBTQ+ parents like Ella, Brian, Kinsey, and Sarah, sharing their stories for Family Equality’s Voices of Children amicus briefs at the height of the fight for marriage equality, earning acknowledgment from Justice Anthony Kennedy during oral arguments in Hollingsworth v. Perry and in the decisions to strike down the Defense of Marriage Act (Windsor v. United States) and establish marriage equality (Obergefell v. Hodges).

2000s – 2010s

Passionate community-builders planning and hosting Family Weekends across the country, starting their own local LGBTQ+ family groups, and even helping us during the peak of the COVID-19 pandemic to develop virtual peer support spaces for families in need of community.

2010s – 2020s

Faith leaders, child welfare workers, and people with lived experience in adoption and foster care sharing their stories of family and acceptance before members of Congress and the whole world in an effort to end discrimination in child welfare as part of our Every Child Deserves a Family campaign and in our amicus brief for the landmark Supreme Court case, Fulton v. City of Philadelphia.

2010s – 2020s

Thousands of families making phone calls and sending emails to elected officials after the overturning of Roe v. Wade to secure the Respect for Marriage Act, which ensures that LGBTQ+ families will be treated equally under the eyes of the law no matter what the future holds

2022

LGBTQ+ parents, students, and educators joining Family Equality in taking Florida to court over their now infamous “Don’t Say Gay and Trans” law, ultimately restoring compassion to the classroom with a historic settlement.

2024

Make no mistake: The history of Family Equality is the history of our families — LGBTQ+ parents, children of LGBTQ+ parents, allies, and friends who make up this forty-five year old movement, often just by being themselves when the world was pushing back against them.

In an annual report from 1999, our former Executive Director, C. Ray Drew, wrote about extremists who were attempting to undermine LGBTQ+ progress by painting LGBTQ+ parents in dangerous and harmful ways. He wrote: “Two lesbians or two gay men simply walking into a supermarket with their children can be the strongest political act in our community. [LGBTQ+] parents ‘take back’ what has been denied our community through 30 years of false information from the right wing by becoming parents and visibly organizing. Through this simple yet daring act, [we] personify the idea that ‘the personal is political.’”

Every little moment — every child who corrected their teachers, every drag mother who opened her door, every grandparent who accepted their children’s children — adds up to something bigger. And, you’re a part of it.

Share your family story

While papers, photos, and files help document Family Equality’s forty-five year legacy, we know that every LGBTQ+ family has their own story to tell. So, this LGBTQ+ History Month, as we celebrate our 45th anniversary, we want to hear from the real history-makers who have shaped this movement for equality: YOU!

Whether you want to gush about the parent that changed your life, the feeling of holding your child for the first time, or the experience of finding family where you once thought it was lost…We want to hear about it!

Reach out to me to set up a time to talk, or, if you prefer, fill out our online form to share your memories and we’ll be in touch to chat more. Together, we can tell the story of LGBTQ+ family life over the past forty-five years so that future generations can tap into the strength, joy, love, and hope that’s gotten us where we are today. Because we believe in a world where everyone can experience the unconditional joy and belonging of family—past, present, and future—and it all starts with you.

Anna Santa Maria

Associate Director of Archives, Storytelling, and Brand

Anna (she/her) is Family Equality’s Associate Director of Archives, Storytelling, and Brand, where she works to protect, preserve, and make accessible the history of Family Equality and LGBTQ+ families — past, present, and future. For more than five years, she’s worked at Family Equality on a number of initiatives, including marketing, programming, education, and outreach. Anna also holds a Masters Degree in Library and Information Science with a concentration in Archives Management.

Join us in celebrating our anniversary with a special gift to support our work! By donating $45 for our 45th anniversary, you can ensure we keep up this momentum for years to come. Together, we can make a meaningful difference in the lives of LGBTQ+ individuals and communities.