Gender, adoption, and identity: One new dad’s story on transitioning

Caleb and his wife Sarah are seeking an open adoption.  Originally from Massachusetts and now living in California, they’re certain that the open adoption process is the right choice for thoughtfully expanding their loving family.  One wrinkle: Caleb is trans.
 
California and Massachusetts prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity in adoption, but in most states, it would be much harder, if not impossible, for Caleb and Sarah to build their family.
 
The Every Child Deserves a Family Act would make sure that children across the country could find loving homes with families like Sarah and Caleb’s.
 
Read Caleb’s thoughts below on how being transgender will help him be a better dad.  Pass on the story and the wish that every child could find a family as loving as theirs.

Guestpost by Caleb on offbeatmama.com

Twenty-five years ago, in a Boston hospital, my parents gave me a name. Twenty-two years later, in an Oakland courthouse, I legally took another. Despite being addressed by that name for three years, despite the careful consideration that went into the choosing of it, I left the courthouse lacking. For the first time since beginning my transition from female to male, I felt true loss.

When I began testosterone replacement, I was giddy and excited. Surgery made me anxious, but I was relieved when it was over. And now: nothing. The elation I expected never came. I had rejected the most basic gift from my mother and father — I had declared myself someone other than the daughter they had welcomed two decades earlier.

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