Our House!

Today’s guest post is by Meema Spadola, the director and
producer of Our House (among other nationally broadcast
documentaries). Meema is the proud daughter of a lesbian mom, and
now the proud mother of a beautiful baby boy. She lives in
Brooklyn, NY.

In my family, we’ve had to use some imagination to name my
son’s four grandmothers.  There’s Grandma B (my
mother-in-law), there’s Grancy (Nancy, my father’s wife), Baba
(my mother) and, of course, Gramy (my mother’s wife).  I
haven’t yet found a t-shirt for my son that says “I [heart] my
gay grannies” but I’m guessing it’s just a matter of

This is a far cry from my experience of growing up with a lesbian
mother. Back then, in the small Maine town where we lived, I
couldn’t even tell my closest friends the real reason my mother and
father had divorced. There were no t-shirts to express my status,
let alone any books or TV shows.  How different my childhood would
have been if I had been able to see a family like mine on

That was the driving force behind my documentary, Our House, which
premiered on public television in 2000 and is now
available on DVD
, complete with video extras like family
updates and an in-depth conversation with me and one of the

Our House focuses on the kids in five diverse gay and lesbian
families and is the first and only documentary on this topic made
by the kid of a gay parent. While I was thrilled to show a national
audience our families, I was especially happy to have made the
documentary I wished I had been able to see.  My greatest reward
has been the feedback I’ve received from sons and daughters all
over the country who were happy to see some reflection of their

Our House can’t neatly sum up queer families’ experiences—we
are too diverse racially, ethnically, socio-economically,
geographically, in our religious faith or lack there-of, and how we
were created.  But I do hope the documentary is a step in the
right direction.

I invite people to watch Our House and then visit the documentary’s
to share their own stories.  And if anyone knows of a
cute “I [heart] my gay grannies” t-shirt, let me know!